... a music contrarian

You know me and, for the most part, you all love me. One thing you do know is that I'm a man of somewhat, shall we say, varied tastes. I see no problem living in a world where I can listen to Genesis, Husker Du, P-Funk, Joy Division, Elvis Costello, civil war era music, and the occasional pop track mixed in. I also like to think I'm a pretty big consumer of both pop culture and fine art. If it weren't assoholic to say so, I might actually say I was open minded.

*ahem*

But at the risk of going all Matlock-demographic on you, I gotta say there are some things I just don't get and which make me wanna shake my fist at world. A lot of people like them, but I've tried and tried and I just can't see the big deal.

Now, if there is ANOTHER thing you know about me, it's that I try to expose myself to those things I can't stand so I can try to understand my...displeasure. So for the next little bit, I'm going to share some of these as I try to figure out why I don't like these things.

I just want to say that I don't think these things are, for the most part, horrible and that people who like them have no taste (exception: Nickleback). How I really feel is summed up by a great Graham Parker line I can't see the point but I can see the attraction.

I'm putting an example of a video by each so that you can mock my squareness.

By the way, more people should listen to Graham Parker. More on that later.

Chapter Uno: A music contrarian.

1. Broken Social Scene/Feist/Metric

I'm lumping all of these in one category because of the interconnectedness of them. I know this puts me in a weird minority, but I just don't get the big deal. I hear a lot of serviceable pop tunes, but nothing that really inspires me in them. In a way they remind me about Tony Wilson's quip about jazz: "Jazz musicians enjoy themselves more than anyone listening to them does." I get that they all inspire each other and they all like to work together, but for me the sum of the whole is in no way equal to the sum of the parts. Maybe it has to do with seeing By Divine Right open for three different bands (Foo Fighters, BNL...and someone else, it might have been an Edgefest before they got stuck on suck...though not as much as V-Fest...where was I, oh yeah...) with three completely different sounds.

Fiest and Metric on their own always put me more in mind of other artists I'd rather listen to. Metric just make me want to listen to Blondie or Bloc Party, and something about the way Emily sings and goes la la la. Fiest...and her...well...

Okay...I DON'T GET FEIST! I admit it, I have NO IDEA what the attraction is. She has a weird camera compulsion that drives me batty, and her little girl whisper voice just makes me think that Chrissie Hynde died in vain (yes, I know she's still alive, I'm going for melodrama here). She just reminds me of all the people I knew in university who self-identified "I am a poet...I am a writer...I am a creator" and took themselves so seriously that they were unable to actually create good poetry or writing. Maybe I'm projecting on Fiest, but...no...I just don't get it.

2. Alexisonfire/City and Colour

This isn't quite fair. I love half of every Alexisonfire song. There's normally a very melodic, almost hardcore section to each that I quite enjoy. Rough Hands is a great example of this.

And then George Pettit opens his mouth and screams. People tell me there are clever lyrics in there, but I can't make them out. In a way, he reminds me of the guy in every high school band who had the van and a basement where they could practice, even though he had no real talent. I'm not saying the George has no talent, though I kinda am I guess.

So I should love City and Colour, right? No. There's a certain emotion Dallas Green's side project instills in me that can best be described as The earnest blandies. I know I SHOULD like, the songs are pretty enough, but I just can't be bothered to care in the end. Maybe it has to do with..

3. The Tragically Hip

...Gord Downie. (Man, there are a lot of Canadian bands here...this does not bode well, as it will give the mob gathering outside my home right now more ammunition) I used to be a HUGE Hip fan, but after a while I just got bored with them, just after Phantom Planet. After that point the songs just seemed more about building their mystique than actually being creative. (Also, I've ALWAYS been annoyed that they use the same metaphor - "Garbage bag trees" - on consecutive songs on Fully Completely. It just seems lazy.)

As for live: I've seen them a few times, and just....meh.

Having said all that, "Nautical Disaster" is one my fave songs of all time. Go figure. Let's listen it, shall we?

4. Nine Inch Nails

(Wow, someone not Canadian)

I admire Trent Reznor and what he's done for indie music and getting it out there. I just wish it was in service of something that wasn't so self-involved and boring. Yes, yes, I know I like Genesis so I lose the moral high ground here, but I've yet to hear a NiN song that didn't make my molars hurt. It's something about either the frequency of their music, or the key they play in.

Plus, they got, as the kids say today, pawneededed by The Man in Black

5. Billy Talent

The Edge loves these guys to the point where "conflict of interest" comes up (seeing as the lead singer was an intern there). Me, they remind me of Our Lady Peace: serviceable musicianship hampered by the most annoying singing voice. I keep hearing about how great they are, but it's just so very fetch.

6. Silversun Pickups

If I wanted to listen to Smashing Pumpkins, I would listen to Smashing Pumpkins.



You may commence the hating on of me.